All’s fair in love and meme wars.

My husband and I don’t fight.  Instead, he gets frustrated and ignores me until he calms down and when he starts talking to me again – all is good.  It took me a while to figure out this routine…I learned the hard way not to poke a contemplating bear, never ask, “are you done being mad at me yet” (that just starts the ignoring time clock over), and don’t broach the subject once talking as resumed (that’s considered a second offense and the ignoring time gets doubled for each subsequent infraction).

Today I tried something new – wait, I’m getting ahead of myself.  The argument stemmed from my daughter missing the bus.  Apparently everyone was trying to call me but my ringer was off.  I don’t know what I could have done about it, but that’s a moot point and the kids called my husband instead…bad move people!  Have I taught you nothing?!?!  The only time you should call your father is when you see a picture of your shiny face on a milk carton…even then you should pretend to be orphans and walk south until you hit Houston and wander around calling out your Nina and Grandpa’s names until they find you.

(Since my ringer was off) my husband decided to give me a hard time via voice mail.   I decided to dole out my own passive aggressive responses in the form of memes!  I know I will pay a huge price for this (in the form of hickeys no doubt), but it was totally worth it!

Here’s how it went down:

Ford’s voice mail:  We have been trying to call you.  Get off the phone or answer or call me back.  There is a reason we are trying to get ahold of you.

Me:  For the record, I wasn’t on the phone and I wasn’t  avoiding you – my ringer was off.  I know there’s always a reason – that’s my line.

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Me: Is your ringer off now too?  There’s always a reason [ok, that might have been some intentional bear poking]

Ford: No I’m ignoring you.  I was on another text!

Me:  Pahahahaha!  Right 😉

Ford:  You obviously have too much time on your hands…

Ford: ILYM, good of you to finally recognize that.

It went south from there – I can’t share the next 3 back and forths, but it’s safe to say that I haven’t laughed that hard in a long time!  And…